Being the designated AUX cord DJ for your friends can be such a burden. It is really a selfless act that goes unnoticed because you are forced to put your wants and needs aside for the greater good. You gotta give the people what they want…and sometimes that means skipping Jidenna’s “The Let Out” even though it’s a really good song but no one was REALLY fucking with it besides you. Yes, that was a real experience. Nothing worse than hearing “Who is this?” when you play a song no one really knows because 1) They’ll actually like the song and inquire on more details about the artist or 2) They clown ya ass and say “turn that shit off, YEEN AIN’T GOT NO YEEZY?!”. So, I’m forced to live a life of secrecy with my guilty pleasure songs that I never play around any other ears because they just wouldn’t understand.
Yeah, I’m starting the list off strong with Switch. Whoever says this track doesn’t make them move is a liar. It’s clean, wholesome and a bop. If you never heard this song, you are a loser and you should be glad I just put you on. I feel like if there’s really people out there who enjoy LL Cool J’s Headsprung, I don’t see why Switch can’t get any love. Big Willie gave us #bars with the hat cocked to the side as he reminded you fuckboys that yeah he may be a movie star but the flow is still there. Real niggas know this goes up in the club.
There’s a ton of guilty pleasure songs by blonde songstresses and today I’m picking Brooke Hogan’s “About Us”. Brooke teamed up with Paul Wall to give us a Wonderbread Ja Rule/Ashanti collabo and it was kinda lit. “What it dew, Paul Wall?”. The lyrics embody the essence of the Cash Me Outsideee girl topped off with Brooke in some grillz in the video. “I’m just trying to live but your all up in my grill. How’s a girl to breathe with all the media starring down my mouth with a four inch lens. I JUST WANNA HIT THE MALL WITH SOME OF MY FRIENDS!” “ICONIC.
I haven’t been to church in years but I feel like listening to Revolution every now and then purges me of my sins. The hype, the words of encouragement and the fact that I can get jiggy to it makes me know it is definitely on the most high’s playlist. You may be able to get away with playing this song in public because 1) issa gospel song, so people are less likely to rebel against DA LORD 2) it’s the jam.
When I’m asked what I seek in a man, I break into Lady’s verse on this ratchet mess. Basically, I need a boss nigga cause I’m a boss bitch. This is a hood love song as Lady and Fella (love how simple their names are) profess what everyone wants in a mate. Someone who loves me for me, has weed all the time, willing to share their foodstamps, knows how to slang the D or always got that “wet wet”. Is that too much to ask for? You have to be on a certain level of intelligence to understand where this song comes from.
And for the freaks, I leave you with Danny Brown’s “I Will”. “You looking for a real pussy eater? I can be it”. What’s not to love as Danny brags about how much cunnilingus he’ll provide you with in any circumstance. He doesn’t care if it’s sour, shaved or nappy just as long as it’s not nasty. My kind of man basically. If his skills are as good as he makes it sound, I may put it on his face but we gotta use a female condom and he better not tell anybody!